The Mental Side of Returning to Work After a Career Break

There are plenty of resources out there on how to write the perfect resume or how to nail an interview.

But there’s one part of returning to work after a career break that doesn’t get nearly enough attention.

The mental part.

When I returned to work after my own career break, I had a lot of thoughts and feelings that I wasn’t prepared for. Doubt. Fear. Guilt. A constant questioning of myself.

And I thought I was alone in these feelings.

That was until I started interviewing women for my Career Relaunch workshop and realized something important: women from all walks of life were struggling with the same exact thoughts.

So in this post, I want to walk through the three most common mental struggles women face when returning to the paid workforce after a career break. These are struggles I’ve experienced myself and ones I hear about regularly from the women I work with.

My hope is that if you’re dealing with any of these, you’ll feel less alone and more grounded as you move forward.

Why Career Breaks Can Shake Your Identity

Before we talk about the three struggles, I want to zoom out for a moment.

From a very young age, society places a huge emphasis on careers.

When kids are four or five, they’re asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

In high school, that question becomes, “What are you going to study?”

In college, it’s all about majors.

And once you’re in the working world, one of the first questions people ask when getting to know you is, “What do you do?”

It’s no wonder our identities become so closely tied to what we do for a paycheck.

But I want you to remember that your worth, value, and identity are not determined by your employment status.

And it’s something I wish, as a society, we would stop reinforcing.

Struggle #1: Feeling “Irrelevant”

One of the most common thoughts I hear from women returning to work is some version of this:

“I’m just a stay-at-home mom.”

“I don’t have any transferable skills”

“Who is going to want to hire me?”

If you took a career break to care for children, a spouse, a parent, or even your own mental health, you ARE doing work. What you are doing is relevant. It is valuable. And it matters.

The issue isn’t that your experience isn’t relevant. It’s the way you’re framing it.

Instead of thinking, “I don’t have transferable skills,” take time to reflect on everything you do on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis. Write it down.

Advocating for your children.
Managing schedules.
Handling household finances.
Volunteering.

Those are transferable skills.

And if the phrase “I’m just a stay-at-home mom” ever pops into your head, I want you to remove the word just immediately.

Caregiving is one of the most challenging, rewarding, frustrating, and demanding roles there is. If you can figure that out without formal training or onboarding, there are very few jobs you can’t learn.

Struggle #2: Impostor Syndrome

Impostor syndrome tends to show up loudly during a job search, especially after a career break.

It sounds like:

“What am I doing here?”
“I’m a fraud.”
“They’re going to figure out I don’t belong.”

And it can show up at every stage. When you’re applying. When you’re interviewing. Even after you land the role.

I once knew a mom who was returning to the workforce and had a former coworker approach her about a role they genuinely thought she’d be a great fit for.

But her impostor syndrome was so strong that she took herself out of the running before she ever gave herself a chance.

I don’t want that to be you.

Studies suggest that 70–80% of people experience impostor syndrome at some point. That means the majority of people around you have felt exactly what you’re feeling.

The difference isn’t that confident people don’t experience impostor syndrome. It’s that they don’t let it stop them.

Returning to work, trying something new, or pivoting into a different role almost guarantees some level of discomfort. You can’t grow without it.

The goal isn’t to eliminate impostor syndrome. It’s to move forward anyway.

Struggle #3: Guilt

Guilt is a big one.

Sometimes it comes from outside sources. Family. Friends. Society. And sometimes it comes from within.

If the guilt is coming from others, I want you to remember this: you cannot control other people’s thoughts or feelings. And there’s no value in spending energy trying to manage them.

As for the guilt you place on yourself, especially when you have children, I understand it deeply.

Returning to work or pursuing a new venture often means your time is divided differently.

But ask yourself this: what would you want for your child?

You’d want them to feel fulfilled.
You’d want them to pursue their goals.
You’d want them to build a life that feels meaningful to them.

Why shouldn’t you want the same for yourself?

It’s not only healthy for you to pursue things outside of caregiving. It’s healthy for your children to see it. One day, they’ll be adults too.

And modeling a full, balanced sense of self matters.

Letting Go of What Holds You Back

The mental side of returning to work isn’t talked about nearly enough, but it’s something so many women struggle with. And the more we talk about it, the less scary it becomes.

My hope for you is that you surround yourself with women who support you, encourage you, and understand this season of life. Use them as a sounding board.

And when you succeed in your job search, which I truly believe you will, I challenge you to turn around and be that support for someone else.

You are not alone in this.

And you always have a cheerleader in your corner. That’s me.

And if you're wondering how to best position your unique, amazing and talented self in your job search book your free discovery call to set yourself up for success as you return back to the paid workforce.